so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
babies were throwing up all over the place
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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