Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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