Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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