Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
