hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
