I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
