I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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