Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize
