How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Let's get the cat blown out
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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