try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Randomize
