We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Randomize
