Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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