Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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