I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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