put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
