gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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