blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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