I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
