is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
