it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
