did you get engaged???
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
