You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
We just shotgunned beers for America
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
