I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize
