Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
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