I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize