Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
PANTIES FOUND
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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