and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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