There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
