but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
