I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
