So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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