hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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