ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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