Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Randomize
