i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
