I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
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