It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
