Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
