I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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