i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
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