Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
