More tranny stories later!
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
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