after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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