I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
