Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
