At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
jump out the window naked night went bad
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
