I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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