They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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