1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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