I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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